Wednesday, January 16, 2008

The best joke of the year for ladies / 本年度最受女性歡迎的笑話

This is the best joke to read by all men. It is in mandarin and here I try my best to translate in English.

最後那個結局,簡直妙呆了!
The final ending is just mysterious!

有個男人已經超厭煩他每天都要去公司上班,但他老婆卻可以成天待在家裡.
There is a man extremely hate to work in the office everyday. But his wife can stay at home for the whole day.

於是,他向上帝禱告說: 「親愛的主,我每天上班投入八個鐘頭的時間,但我的老婆只待在家裡 ,我希望讓她知道我過的是怎麼樣的日子,所以請讓我們的身體交換 ! 」上帝以祂無比的智慧,成就了這個男人的願望。
Therefore, he prayed to God, "Dear God, everyday I was giving my best in working for 8 hours but my wife can only stay at home, I hope to let her know how do I past my days, so can please let us get exchange of our body!" God is having his all mighty wisdom and answer his prayer.

隔天,這男人一起床就成了個女人。他一起床,就開始為他的伴侶作早點,再三去叫醒那些賴床的孩子們,在回家路上,還要去洗衣店收送衣服,還要到銀行存錢,到菜市場買菜,然後回家把菜放一邊,還要仔細記帳 .記完帳之後,他清了貓的砂盒,後來還替狗洗澡...
The next day, this man wake up become a woman. The minute he wakes, he started to prepare breakfast for his partner, later when to wake up his kids. On the way home, drop by to the dobi to send and collect clothes, went to the bank to deposit some money, went to the market to buy food then the minute reach home and drop aside the food, need to record in detail of some expenses. After that, need to clean the mess for his cat and bath the dog.

然後時間已經下午一點鐘了,他趕快把棉被折好,洗衣服,擦地板… 餵完貓狗,他衝到學校去接小孩,然後還得和那些越來越沒大沒小的孩子們一路上大小聲。
回家之後,他幫孩子準備點心和牛奶,讓孩子乖乖地寫功課,然後他把燙馬擺好。
By the time of doing all that, it is already 1pm. He needs to fold the blanket, wash the clothes, mop the floor, feed the pets then rush to school to fetch the kids. Later on the way back, need to talk to the kids who rather not that respect in high low volume.
Reach home, he help the kids to prepare for tea time and milk, let the kids be good to finish the homework and he got to prepare to iron clothes.


一邊燙衣服一邊看肥皂劇重播,下午四點半,他開始削馬鈴薯,洗菜作沙拉烤肉餅,為晚餐做準備. 晚餐後,那個死不要臉的老婆,剛下班一吃完飯,然坐在客廳看起足球賽來!
他則忙著整理廚房洗碗,把收好的衣服摺好,哄小孩睡覺。
While ironing the clothes at the same time watching some soaps. 4.30pm, he starts scrape the potatoes, clean the vege and make salad with roasted meat slice and get ready for dinner. After dinner, the wife sit in front of the TV watching the football match right after she back from work and dinner. He then need to busy to clean up the kitchen and dishes, fold the clothes and coax the kids to sleep.

晚上九點,他已經累壞了, 但是又擔心白天的雜務還很多沒作完................
不管了,他終於衝上床想休息了,但是這時那個閒得發慌的老婆,竟然還興致勃勃提議要「嘿咻嘿咻」,他心不甘情不願,但還是努力裝得很愉快,設法不要抱怨。
It is 9pm, he is dead tired, still worried of the daily chores are not settle.....
Do not care for it, he then went to bed for rest. But the crazy free wife suggest for some good time. No matter how unwillingly he is, he is pretend hard to enjoy it and not to grumble.


隔天他一起床 , 立刻靠著床邊跪下來,流淚跟上帝說:「主啊 ! 我不知道我之前在想什麼,現在我知道我實在錯得離譜,竟錯到去妒嫉我老婆整天在 ? a! 求求您,讓我們換回來吧 ! 」
Next day, the minute he wakes, immediately he kneel down in tears and say to God, "Oh God! I do not know what I'm thinking before this, now I understand I get wrong of that very badly, where I get to jealous my wife for being good to stay at home everyday. I seek for your kindness, pls let us change back!"

主以祂無比的智慧,回答他: 「孩子,我很高興知道你已學到了智慧, 而且,我也很願意把你們兩人換回來,
但.... 你還要等二百七十九天,
因為...
God having his all mighty wisdom answer him, "Son, I'm very happy that you finally learn the lesson and get the knowledge, furthermore, I'm willingly to change back to who you are, but......you got to wait another 279 days,
because.......

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「昨天晚上, 你懷孕了! 」
"You got pregnant last night!"

3 comments:

Sasha said...

OH NO!

muahahhahahah

Hazel said...

haha...

L'abeille said...

Aiya sei for loh!